Where Art Thou Hip Hop?
In the religious folklore that is Hip Hop, DJ Kool Herc is the Father, the author of Genesis. Every time you nod your head, admire the rhythmic marriage of two disparate beats, kick a drunken freestyle, or watch your favorite athlete hit The Dougie after scoring, you have Clive Campbell to thank. If Hip Hop made any sense, every culture junkie would adorn their home with a shiny, brass relief of the revolutionary DJ. Yet, despite Herc's legacy, Hip Hop has tragically failed its founding father.
This week news spread of Kool Herc's unfortunate health condition. As he painfully battles kidney stones without the financial resources to pay for proper treatment, P. DitchMe and Ricky Rogaine are bragging across the internets about dropping a milli on well deserving skripper booties. Every other wealthy beneficiary of Hip Hop is gearing up to host parties and pay 400% club inflation for overpriced bottles of bubbly during Super Bowl weekend. Yes, the man who made it possible for Negroes to get rich while spreading the Gospel of Hip Hop writhes in pain, while his ungrateful grandchildren gallivant and wipe their asses with the 10K he needs to pay for his surgery.
WTF is wrong with Hip Hop culture? This is not how you honor a founding father of the movement that defines your life. Kool Herc, Afrika Bambaataa, and Grand Wizzard Theodore should live in palaces with 200 foot monuments erected to honor their noble contributions to society. The blatant disregard Hip Hop has for its heroes reveals why it has devolved into nothing more than irrelevant conjecture and highfalutin niggadry.
Until Hip Hop gets its head out of its ass, YOU can perform your civic duty to ensure that Kool Herc receives his just due reward. After all, he only developed the best thing that's happened to YOU since... since... since LIFE! Before you turn on your iPod or roll your next paper plane to Wiz Khalifa, make sure to donate to the man who made it all possible - DJ Kool Herc HERE. If you don't donate go ahead and smack your own kufi off, you filthy heathen.]]>